Christina’s Edition: A Time Travis Was Bullied in Front of Me

So, this has been simmering in my mind since it happened and I’d like to share with you how the world could do a whole lot less with super negative people that spew hate.

Right at the start of Autumn we went on a trip to New England, mainly so I could experience Salem and Plymouth Rock. Travis was super excited that we bought tickets to see the Red Sox play at Fenway Park. We had super great seats, enjoyed a hot dog, I got my historic stamp on Yawkey Way, and the Astros won (Travis is from the Houston area). We even splurged for the parking lot 10 ft from the stadium. The day was great, until we were driving out of the lot.

We got to our rental car and proceed to the long line of cars waiting to make their way into traffic. Just as it was our turn to pull out, a girl in the car directly in front of us sticks her head out the side window (she was probably around 22, old enough to know better) and starts screaming how hipsters should not be allowed to wear glasses. I look around and I don’t see anyone, surely, she wasn’t talking about us. Nothing against hipsters but Trav doesn’t wear skinny jeans or resemble one. It took me a moment but then I realized she was talking about him. Screaming that he didn’t need glasses and that they were fake and demanding he take them off. We rolled our windows up.

This really shouldn’t have bothered me, but…. Does she really think that Travis wears SUPER thick large glasses because he wants to? He has the quintessential coke bottle glasses. They are nice, but they are extremely necessary.

What I wanted to say to her was that these glasses are the result of typhoid, malaria, and a traumatic brain injury. Glasses that are needed because he passed out in Tanzania from a fever that literally boiled his brain, was life flighted to Nairobi, and caused his organs to shut down. Glasses that he is reliant on because a mosquito bit him while he was deep in South Sudan, a country riddled with land mines just waiting to explode, helping the villagers there. Glasses that help this man see because a lady smashed through his car in an SUV and knocked his head so hard that his vision is permanently blurred.

People in this world go around poking their nose into people’s lives without any compassion or sympathy. We have empowered a generation that believes it is perfectly okay to say something to someone so rude and ignorant just because they can.

People were jerks well before this generation, don’t get me wrong, but there happens to be a lot more of this entitlement going around in recent years. People feel they can say whatever they want without regard to feelings, or at the most basic level, respect of another human being.

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We simply rolled up the window because it was the right thing to do. But 2 months later and I am still annoyed that someone could be so hateful to my Travis. I happen to think I married a very gentle, kind, loving soul who could never imagine saying anything rude…. I think I could count on one hand the amount of ridiculous things I’ve heard him say in private. I’m not trying to put him on a pedestal, but, when you choose to spew hate, you leave no room to see the good in someone.

I implore anyone reading this to think twice before judging or criticizing someone. People are more than glasses, skinny jeans, and v-neck t-shirts. There is always more to the story than coke bottle glasses and an annoyed wife.

The world could do a whole lot better at empathy and biting of the tongue.

Thanks for listening to me vent for a moment, folks. I hope someone out there found something in it that resonated with you.

P.S.

I think his glasses are sexy 😉

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20 comments

  1. I totally agree with you, Christina, and I’m so sorry you and Travis went through this. Some people just feel the need to be mean instead of being helpful, or just simply, shutting up! What’s the point in saying things that aren’t kind? Does it really change a situation? All it does is hurt someone’s feelings and possibly, make them feel worse than they might already feel. Great post!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. People can be awful! I always told my son growing up that no one was better than him and he was no better than anyone else, to always treat people the way he wanted them to treat him. I am not sure where attitudes have come from lately, but it is tiring to hear people act that way. So sorry you and Travis had a bad ending to what sounded like a good time.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you for reading and for your reply! That is a great way to raise your son. More people should have that mindset. We mostly had a great time. Just one bad experience. Thank you.. have a lovely weekend! – Christina

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  3. People in their 20’s were being invasive and rude, when I was in MY 20’s. Like, “Teddythedog”, I have long devoted myself to helping teens and young adults overcome the exuberance that sudden empowerment sometimes brings with it. It doesn’t help that we have a certain group of my own generation (Boomers) stoking the fires of self-righteousness. My empathy for your distasteful experience, especially having happened in the city of my youth.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you. And thank you for your reply. Thank you for your devotion to changing the mindsets of young people. We did have a lovely time. Fenway Park was amazing, and Boston/Salem was a lot of fun. Just this one bad experience.

      Hope you have a great weekend – christina

      Liked by 1 person

  4. This is so typical of individuals who are insecure within themselves… they seek to destroy others when in reality they are speaking to themselves. It’s sad how many do not consider the deeper concerns within the human heart. There is always more to consider and as someone who has been bullied, I know what it feels like to have people not consider my feelings and my story. I believe in compassion and it’s takes so much for me to have patience with those who hurt others. I probably would have stuck my head out of that window and gave her the cuss out of a lifetime, but you are a good human for not stooping to her level. This is a great read

    Liked by 2 people

    • Hi Ta’lor, you’re right, they must have been insecure about something! Trust me, I would have loved to have gotten out of the car and said something, my type-A personality complained about it all the way back to the hotel.

      Have a wonderful weekend!
      -Christina

      Liked by 1 person

  5. This is so typical of drivers in Boston so don’t take it personally. It is the typical mindset of metroBoston driving. I grew up in southern NH, moved away to Indiana for 19 years and when I moved back I really noticed it as I wasn’t accustomed to it anymore. It had nothing to do with Travis, more just a drivers mentality that is typical and somewhat selfish and rude in the area. If you are too nice a driver in the metroBoston area you pretty much cannot get where you are going so everyone learns it after they drive in it too long. Some people are just nicer about dealing with it than others.

    After moving back a year and a half ago, I could barely drive in southern New Hampshire due to my eyes, it was overly stressful. I had one guy in a drive through line yelling at me rudely, other people cutting me off when I was trying to GPS myself somewhere and it hard for me to process all that is going on around me, listen to the directions and make a turn in time without total confusion.

    As for my glasses, I got them recently and they are very blue tinted. They feel weird when I sit indoors and I almost look like I’m wearing sunglasses but I’m trying to take the approach that I’m wearing hip glasses (because I need them). And it’s nobody’s business why my glasses are what they are (yes they look weird and not like anybody else), let them judge because it only hurts the person judging if we just embrace ourselves as we are where we are at.

    And yes, his glasses look awesome! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you for reading and your reply! I do understand that people in different geographic locations have different cultures and a way of life. However being that my husband and I are very well traveled, from experience I can say that this action is not acceptable and is personal. Culture and geography are not an excuse for bad behavior and bullying. We weren’t on the highway. This was not road rage. We were in a line in a parking lot right next to these people. We will just have to disagree on that.

      And for your glasses, yes! Keep doing you! – Christina

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  6. Completely understood as when I was yelled at in the drive through line, the gentleman (with MA plates) clearly was making a judgement on me that was completely rude and uncalled for and targeted at me. I definitely did not mean to make it sound like I was excusing completely inappropriate behavior. :0)
    I cannot drive in MA and most specifically Boston, I have had to have my boyfriend, family and friends drive me on the occasions I have head down to that area.

    Liked by 1 person

    • I understand. We are good 🙂

      That area is a rough place to drive around. The highway system there is awful as well. And I am sorry you were judged. But I am glad you have a good support system to help you out!

      Like

  7. What a terrible experience! Human beings can be dreadful bullies. Or they can be kind and compassionate. I think you two are the latter, as well as being very brave. I know it is hard, but best to forget about that nasty episode, and move on. Rise above it. Try not to let the negativity fester, it is not worth the energy. Save that for better stuff. You are both awesome. Your post was great, and Travis’s glasses, and the reasons for having to wear them in the first place, are also awesome! Thank you for telling your amazing story.

    Liked by 1 person

    • I totally agree with you. I believe it had a hold on me for so long because it was about Travis. But writing this and getting it off my chest helps. We just hope this makes a dent in the awareness around bullying. Thank you so much for reading and replying! – Christina

      Liked by 1 person

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